Well, I made it through my day of grief somehow intact. I've decided that although all I feel like doing is staying in bed with the covers pulled over my head, in hopes that the big bad monster Grim Reaper will disappear and return our family member to us, instead I am going to just keep putting one foot in front of the other and do the things that I've been doing. Best case scenario, I'll work all the sadness out; worst case scenario I will be able to prevent myself from turning into a 600 pound blob while I figure out what this whole life thing is all about again.
So although I sincerely debated calling off my walking date with K and M, I got myself dressed and headed out anyway. Hampering my depression, the weather was beautiful tonight, just the right amount of sun and heat and breeze. Further hindering my sinking emotions was good conversation with amazing ladies. Bah, I'll admit it. The whole endeavor cheered me up a little bit.
We made it through two miles of track before we all had to say our goodbyes and get back to our various evening chores (I get off easy by only having to write this blog and take a shower before Pooch starts giving me dirty looks). I'm still sad, but I can tell that the momentum at least helped my body to feel better. It's amazing, but that commercial for anti-depressants that plays periodically that says, "Where does depression hurt? Everywhere." is accurate. It's important when we get into these depressed, unsure and unmotivated frames of mind that we get out and continue to do something. It never hurts anything, aside from putting a dent in our depression and reminding us that life does go on.
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